The New Yorker v. Us Weekly
I just finished reading parts of D's New Yorker and have some entertaining news to share with you.
1) Apparently for $19.95 you can join a service where you get a recorded message from Britney Spears each month. Sadly, many of the subscribers are grown men. Typical messages include "If I had a party, I'd totally invite you!" and astrological predictions.
2) I started reading an article about W's new Supreme Court nominee, but I didn't make it to the end. Apparently W wants a new justice in the mold of Clarence Thomas and Antonin Scalia. *sinking feeling* Although I remember in law school, I didn't agree with Scalia's politics, but I found his opinions the easiest to read. He's a very clear, concise writer. Reading this article (at least in part) marked a milestone for me. My distaste for law (after working in the field) is pretty much complete, so I haven't read anything pertaining to law in a long, long time.
3) I read David Sedaris' "Reflections", which was my favorite part of the magazine. It was really funny. He just keeps getting better.
4) The Oompa-Loompas in "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" had to undergo grueling auditions and diets. One of the Oompa-Loompas, named Deep Roy, danced to the song "It's Not Unusual" and "did the little hop that Tom Jones does." Tim Burton loved this and hired him. But then Roy had to give up beer - too many carbs - and get measured every week to ensure he didn't gain weight. Roy started out at 4'4", weighing 77 pounds.
I also read Us Magazine and it's been pretty dull lately. Samples:
1) Angelina adopted a baby girl. That's good, and heartening, but not particularly entertaining.
2) Tom Cruise appears to have brainwashed Katie Holmes completely. She's now followed around by a Scientology handler named Jessica. Katie visited an orphanage in Rome and hung out with the children. When asked why she did this, she responded, "I had heard about the orphanage and the children and I wanted to visit the children." Doesn't this sound like a canned response? Like she's programmed or something? Her interview responses are starting to freak me out. I think she can find someone who won't take over her whole life. Maybe Katie Holmes and Michael Vartan? Or Katie Holmes and Scott Foley? Not Vince Vaughn.
3) Britney's pregnant and got her hair cut.
I think the New Yorker is winning. This week, anyway.
1) Apparently for $19.95 you can join a service where you get a recorded message from Britney Spears each month. Sadly, many of the subscribers are grown men. Typical messages include "If I had a party, I'd totally invite you!" and astrological predictions.
2) I started reading an article about W's new Supreme Court nominee, but I didn't make it to the end. Apparently W wants a new justice in the mold of Clarence Thomas and Antonin Scalia. *sinking feeling* Although I remember in law school, I didn't agree with Scalia's politics, but I found his opinions the easiest to read. He's a very clear, concise writer. Reading this article (at least in part) marked a milestone for me. My distaste for law (after working in the field) is pretty much complete, so I haven't read anything pertaining to law in a long, long time.
3) I read David Sedaris' "Reflections", which was my favorite part of the magazine. It was really funny. He just keeps getting better.
4) The Oompa-Loompas in "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" had to undergo grueling auditions and diets. One of the Oompa-Loompas, named Deep Roy, danced to the song "It's Not Unusual" and "did the little hop that Tom Jones does." Tim Burton loved this and hired him. But then Roy had to give up beer - too many carbs - and get measured every week to ensure he didn't gain weight. Roy started out at 4'4", weighing 77 pounds.
I also read Us Magazine and it's been pretty dull lately. Samples:
1) Angelina adopted a baby girl. That's good, and heartening, but not particularly entertaining.
2) Tom Cruise appears to have brainwashed Katie Holmes completely. She's now followed around by a Scientology handler named Jessica. Katie visited an orphanage in Rome and hung out with the children. When asked why she did this, she responded, "I had heard about the orphanage and the children and I wanted to visit the children." Doesn't this sound like a canned response? Like she's programmed or something? Her interview responses are starting to freak me out. I think she can find someone who won't take over her whole life. Maybe Katie Holmes and Michael Vartan? Or Katie Holmes and Scott Foley? Not Vince Vaughn.
3) Britney's pregnant and got her hair cut.
I think the New Yorker is winning. This week, anyway.
Comments
:)
He would be a bad match for Katie Holmes though, don't you think?
Supposedly he and Jennifer Aniston are *not* dating. He said, "There are worse things to be accused of, though."
I did see a New York magazine cover that said "Celebrity Psychos" and showed him and Katie in straitjackets.
I hope she comes out of this OK. I have a feeling their relationship will be the subject of a celebrity memoir someday.